Remember there's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over.
You have just destroyed one model XQJ-37 nuclear powered pansexual roto-plooker....and you're gonna have to pay for it.
He was in a quandary...being devoured by the swirling cesspool of his own steaming desires... uh.. the guy was a wreck
And now....you are going to dance...like you've never danced before!
Bring the band on down behind me, boys.
Not a speck of cereal.
Nothing but the best for my dog.
You drank beer, you played golf, you watched football - WE EVOLVED!
It looks just like a Telefunken U-47!
Don't mind your make-up, you'd better make your mind up.
They're serving burgers in the back!
Jazz is not dead...it just smells funny.
Beebop tango introduction
I have a message to deliver to the cute people of the world...if you're cute, or maybe you're beautiful...there's MORE OF US UGLY MOTHERFUCKERS OUT THERE THAN YOU ARE!! So watch out.
Is that a real poncho or a Sears poncho?
You're an asshole! You're an asshole! That's right! You're an asshole! You're an asshole! Yes yes!
Number one ain't you... You ain't even number two.
Who are the brain police?
A prune isn't really a vegetable... CABBAGE is a vegetable...
Here's one for mother
Only thirteen, and she knows how to NASTY
ARE YOU HUNG UP?
Don't it ever get lonesome?
Eddie, are you kidding?
I'll do the stupid thing first and then you shy people follow...
Stupidity is the basic building block of the universe.
Never try to get your peter sucked in France.
Kill Ugly Radio
I'm not black, but there's a whole lot of times I wish I could say I'm not white.
Help! I'm a rock!
Another day, another sausage...
I want a garden!
Don't mind your make-up, you'd better make your mind up.
Great googly-moogly - you're gonna do it too!
Gee, it's so hard to find a place to park around here.
Playing guitar is like fucking -- you never forget it. Unless you're really, really stupid.
There are more love songs than anything else.
If songs could make you do something we'd all love one another.
If classical music is the state of the art, then the arts are in a sad state.
Beauty is a French phonetic corruption of a short, cloth neck ornament, currently in resurgence.
Modern music is a sick puppy.
Some Scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.
Most people wouldn't know good music if it came up and bit them in the ass.
My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.
Thanks to our schools and political leadership, the U.S. has acquired an international reputation as the home of 250 million people dumb enough to buy 'The Wacky Wall-Walker.'
The computer can't tell you the emotional story. It can give you the exact mathematical design, but what's missing is the eyebrows.
In the fight between you and the world, back the world.
If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they're gonna murder you in your sleep....
Ugly as I mights be, I am your futum!
There is no hell. There is only France.
Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid.
The bassoon is one of my favorite instruments. It has the medieval aroma -- like the days when everything used to sound like that.
Some people crave baseball -- I find this unfathomable -- but I can easily understand why a person could get excited about playing a bassoon.
Whatever you have to do to have a good time, let's get on with it, so long as it doesn't cause a murder.
Politics is the showbiz of industry.
Let's just admit that public education is mediocre at best.
Without deviation from the norm, 'progress' is not possible.
The last election just laid the foundation of the next 500 years of Dark Ages
A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs treat them like a licence to behave like an asshole.
Flatulence can be cruel!
Speed: It will turn you into your parents.
It's better to have something to remember than nothing to reget...
A mind is like a parachute. It doesnt work if it not open.
